2010 — I resolve to not worry about the impending and very likely unavoidable apocalypse in 2012

I have a New Year’s Confession to make – I believe that the very worst, most gruesome thing a human being can do is spread contagious misinformation. Ok maybe it’s not as bad as genocide or Hello Kitty, but it’s right up there.

Doctors who repeat misinformation about health and weight loss, “news” commentators who mislead viewers about the actions and viewpoints of elected officials and organizations, and the belief that the world is coming to an end. These things make my stomach churn and give me anxiety headaches.

Also, I truly do not care about Pop Culture.

I’ve been trying to care about the lives of famous people for as long as I can remember but I have to admit that it just isn’t working. I try because I feel left out. I’m the girl standing on the edge of the pop culture dance floor because I don’t know the steps to the celebrity infatuation boogie.

While my girlfriends call Brad Pitt and Johnny Depp their “Imaginary Boyfriend,” the only men that I refer to as my “Imaginary Boyfriend” is Paulo Coelho and Brian Greene. As a bookish pre-teen I would go to the mall with girls from school and buy Teen Beat and Tiger Beat because they did, and I would swoon and roll my eyes over OMG! how cute Vinnie Barbarino was…yeah I am THAT old. But the truth is I really never got it. Sigh…I was faking it to fit in and there are times that I still am.

I resolve in this first month of this year to say no more! Because I love fashion, I really do want to know what they are wearing on Gossip Girl, but I can’t bear to watch the program. I feel like my brains are leaking out of my skull.

I can’t watch Entertainment Tonight and I can’t watch any TV show where the senior executives are too young to have the Master’s Degree that they would require to hold that position in real life. If you want to be interested in the lives and cellulite of famous people – go right ahead. But I can no longer join the conversation pretending to care.

Please understand that I do not judge people watching celebritainment, but I do believe that TMZ makes the world a very bad place to live. So if you want kittens to die, go right ahead and continue watching TV shows whose main purpose is to shame and denigrate women.

I’d like to see TMZ go to Chichen Itza in 2012 to film the jiggly thighs of Quetzalcoatl. Ha! Good luck to the paparazzi.

I am finally famous. It’s about freaking time.

Thanks to the technological wonders provided by gadget geeks, I know what you are saying about me on the internet. Oh yes, I know when you Tweet about me, re-Tweet me (I love when that happens) and especially important — I know when you are stealing my content.

Recently, I found out that I am so famous that this entire blog is being stolen. Honestly, it’s about freaking time.

Thank you plusultrablog for importing my ENTIRE blog into your site. Not just the posts where I write about plus size fashion and sales, but you even stole the piece I wrote about my mother’s cancer. Classy.

And um…plus ultra blog. Just…oh my. How fabulous. I wish I had thought of that. Put up a blog that has no original content and no comments, then claim to be the ultra blog. Hee hee…hey Chucklehead, did you learn that in business class?

Yes I sent them an email telling them they are naughty children and to cut that shit out, and I have sent emails to other bloggers whose posts I recognize, but since all identifying names have been removed (but not the links to outside websites) if you have a Body Positive, Fat Positive, Health at Every Size, Diets Are For Dummies, etc., type of blog then you might want to check for yourself to make sure you aren’t also being ripped off.

Seriously though, I am wondering why it has taken so long for this to happen.

Perhaps I have not been controversial enough to have my blog posts stolen. I think it is very important to be nice — of world impact importance — and I have been using my desire for more niceness in the world to be my excuse to avoid internet fights and stay out of the mud slinging.

But, I am realizing that it isn’t nice to pretend that I don’t feel strongly about issues. But I do feel strongly about many things and I am going to write about it here. It is very nice to be honest, tell people where your boundaries are, and to be engaged in important discussions. It is nice to speak honestly and passionately even if those discussions become heated.

And so for 2010 I promise to roll out all kinds of controversy! I’m gonna have blog wars with bloggity badassness so watch out.

You hear me plusultrablog? I’m coming for you.