Finding a Bra that Fits
Now this is a topic close to my heart!
My good friend Mo Pie of BFD Blog (that’s her eating sushi last July when we went out after BlogHer) last week posted a letter from a reader regarding finding a bra that fits. I have often been inspired to bully preach to the people about how to get your bras properly fitted and I thought that since someone actually asked for the information, this might be my opportunity to share information that I have learned over the years from some of the most knowledgeable people in New York City selling foundation garments.
Your brassiere is literally the foundation of your entire outfit so consider dressing from the inside out. Your bra also has a great affect on your posture, your comfort throughout the day, and depending on your breast size, could prevent back pain. A good bra is not something to be taken lightly my sisters!
It is very important to go to a lingerie shop and get yourself measured. It isn’t the same to try and do this for yourself. If you search Google for “find my bra size” you be rewarded with 576,000 pages of information. Ridiculous I say! Preposterious! And for my friends in Paris and Quebec – Merde!
Get thee to a real lingerie shop. In fact, go to several lingerie shops. I’m not talking about going to a department store (even one that seems like they have a good selection), and I’m not talking about the type of bra that is meant to be taken off within a few minutes of hoisting the lacy straps over your shoulders. No! I’m talking about structure and fit in pursuit of the ultimate wardrobe purchase – a bra that fits.
Begin by going to every lingerie shop within an hour drive of your house, your work, your place of worship and your supermarket. They are out there. That place that you’ve never gone inside with the mannequins from 1948 in the store windows and a little old lady with a sewing machine who curses like a sailor sitting behind a curtain in the back of the shop. The one with a cigarette hanging out of her mouth – she is a magician with a brassiere. Find yourself a fairy godmother for your cleavage. Don’t worry if the place isn’t fancy schmancy, go and get fitted.
In case you have never had this experience before this is what it will be like:
The point is, she will ask you to take off your top. Take a deep breath and think of her as a bra doctor. She might touch your bra straps, she might not. She might ask you your bra size, but if she knows what she is doing, she started to size-you-up the moment you walked through the door.
This is your opportunity to try on every bra they have in the store. Try on styles you thought you could never wear. Try on bras you can’t afford. Find out your bra size in different brands and styles and listen up My Sisters — write this information down. If all of this makes you uncomfortable and you don’t like people seeing you nearly naked then have a shot of whiskey and let someone else drive, because there is no other way to get properly fitted.
Some of the people you meet will treat you like royalty and others will treat you like you are an idiot. Some of these women will make tsk tsk noises when they see your back fat. You are dealing with the human race and sometimes people are rude. But remember that you are woman! You are invincible! Don’t take it personally and just take your business elsewhere.
You will find by the end of your quest, a bra technician who will understand your Ying and grok your Yang. She will present you with bras that fit and you will marvel at the way clothing caresses your torso, flows over and around your boobies, and fits comfortably around your back with straps that never leave a red mark on your shoulders. Ahhhh….you will think to yourself….this is how it was meant to be.
And maybe, just maybe, you’ll even consider having a bra custom made for your glorious ta tas. I know you’re thinking that you can’t spend the money but listen to me boobeleh, there is nothing – I am telling you nothing – more important in your wardrobe than owning a good foundation. That’s what my grandma Rose used to tell me and she worked in a New York City sweatshop back in the 1920′s, so she would know.
Yes there are some basics that you have probably already read elsewhere having to do with the quantum physics of bra fittings.
So someone else will measure, but you will still write it all down, right?
I can not rave enough about my love for BiggerBras.com. Oh the selection! Oh the choices! Once I got fitted properly, and had a sense of how specific styles of bras would fit me, I decided that I would try buying online and BiggerBras.com
has become my BFF.
Yes, you can visit Hips and Curves.com – Sexy plus size lingerie for women with curves. Those bras that are meant to be taken off not long after you put them on? Oh they are also an important part of your wardrobe!
Questions, or comments? Have you had a good or bad experience shopping for a bra? What’s your favorite brand? Or have you given up and burned your bra?
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- Oct 13, 2008: Inspiration « B.L.O.G. (Big Lump of Girl) Fights Back
Can we get an AMEN sister?!! AMEN! After lots of weight changes in 6 years (pregnancy, nursing, stress, job changes, moving, lots of exercise, NO exercise, you know… LIFE), I had NO idea what size I was. All I knew is that I wore nursing bras for more than 2 years until my daughter was finally weaned, and then I just didn’t know what to do! I finally got properly fitted this summer (by a younger, shorter woman, with big boobs… also very nice!), and yes, I think she had me try on EVERY BRA IN MY SIZE! I spent a small fortune, but all my other bras were a. falling apart, b. stretched out and not supportive, c. ugly, or d. all of the above. It was a revelation, seriously! And I supported a cool local business. THANKS for this post!!
one addition to what may happen with the bra guru in the dressing room – she may touch your breasts. Seriously. Handle them. This is a good time to remember the “bra doctor” thing. Boobs don’t just march perfectly into a bra, they must be arranged. Nipples must be made to face front. Under-arm splillage must be brought into line. (And no, I’m not talking about bras that are too big or small, and maybe they are, but you won’t know until you arrange yourself properly in the bra and if you’re too quick to do that then your bra doctor will most likely reach right in and do it for you.
Relax. She’s a professional.
Wow thank you for writing this… I have wanted to go and get measured myself but I was quite nervous as of what to expect. Last time I went and got measured for a bra I was a junior in high school with an impatient mother and a salesperson who didn’t really know what she was doing and who made me feel very very very uncomfortable.
I would love to finally know what I really wear.. what fits right and feels good and all that.
One thing that I struggle with is underwires I have large breasts that travel under my arm due to underarm bulge.. and the wires never sit right for me they just dig into my under arms or hit me in my chin when I sit down….. not really the sexiest feeling let me tell ya
Being that I am in a serious relationship right now (my very first) and with engagement/marriage apparently on the horizon that leaves me with the nerves of it being the first time anyone other that me will see more than a wayward bra strap (much less the anxiety and jitters of someone else seeing me… *GASP* Naked for the first time since I was in diapers) the need for a pretty, cute, sexy yet supportive bras has really been on my mind lately and honestly I was clueless as to where to even start.
Thanks for giving me a starters course
Aurora – Good for you! Buying a great bra is uplifting in many ways.
KC – That is a very good point. Getting fitted properly does require that we be willing to have our personal boundaries crossed. We are going to be touched in private places and there really is a way to arrange your boobs within the bra for the best fit, lift and separation.
CordyQ – If the underwire is digggin in then it is possible that you are wearing a bra that is too tight. Also, consider wearing bras with wider straps, meaning 4 or 5 hooks rather than 2 or 3. There are also bras without underwire but with a much stiffer elastic. You won’t get the same lift and separation but your comfort is extremely important. Don’t give up my sister! Keep trying on bras until you find one that points ‘em up and out to God!
Honestly I wouldn’t even worry about being measured. There is no standard in the clothing industry for cup sizes or back sizes, and these can vary widely from brand to brand and style to style.
http://darthfox.livejournal.com/845495.html is the best link I’ve found on how a bra should fit. While some fitters out there know what they’re doing, most apparently don’t (I’ve had fitters in independant, small stores try to foist bras with three cup sizes too small on me.)
Boobsihazthem,
I am very glad you left a comment. I’m sorry to hear that you have had a hard time finding a shop to fit you well. A bra cup three sizes too small? That is truly awful.
But I stand by what I say here. Yes it is true that there will be some shops that don’t really know what they are doing, but there are standards for cup and back sizes and if you keep looking you should be able to find a shop. If you want to send me a private message and tell me where you are I can try and find a reputable shop with good references in your area.
And thanks also for the link to the livejournal site with the measuring info. There are so many websites with that information that I decided to not repeat it here and write about the experience of being fitted in a shop, something that I personally find works best for me.
I have a very large cup size (G) but am very slender across my back. Until I actually got fitted I just assumed my body was the reason that I always looked flabby and blousy on my top half. Oh the joy of actually hoisting those babies up there and finding out I could look hot, which is nothing compared to being comfortable all day.
Every women should get fitted. And invest in at least one good quality nude, plain (no lace, no added anything) bra that fits like a glove and can be worn under any garment without any lines.
Check out http://www.figleaves.com/uk/fitting_room.asp?cat=164 for a free ebook you can download to see if your bra is supporting you. I agree with Corinna though – if you haven’t been fitted in a while, or ever, suck it up at least once. It may be uncomfortable but it could be a life changing experience. It was for me.
I have a bit more to say about sizing of bras and industry standards.
It is true that in the bra industry, there are no standards for the naming of bra sizes. Each country and even each manufacturer, may name their cup sizes in whatever way they consider marketable.
The one constant is the increment between sizes. In most parts of the world that increment is 1″. In Australia, the increment is 2 cm which is closer to 3/4″.
Here is a link to a chart with data: http://www.patternschool.com/braswire.shtml
This is why it is important to know your own measurements and to check the manufacturers sizing chart whether you are buying bras or clothes.
Excellent points – as someone who thought she was a frumpy, lumpy 38DD but turned out to actually be a perky, far more slender-looking 34GG, I know how a well-fitting bra can change your life. I just wanted to add, though, that I wouldn’t trust a tape measure as far as I could throw it – all kinds of breast shapes are different, as are bras, so it’s much better to know what a great-fitting bra looks and feels like. I go to a wonderful bra shop here in the UK, which specialises in larger cups, and they have two fab videos – one showing an actual fitting, and one quick guide – which are really really useful. They’re here: http://www.bravissimo.com/perfectfit/getting-the-perfect-fit/video.aspx Worth a look, especially if you can’t find someone enlightened enough to drop the tyranny of the tape measure.
I can never find a bra that fits. I am in between an A and a B cup. If the band fits the cup is too big, if the cup fits the band is too tight. And the straps always fall off my shoulders unless I get a racer back. And lace itches. I just go with sports bras now.
Like Happycat I’m between an A and B cup and find it almost impossible to get bras as according to measurements i’m a 40A but i’ve found that some M&S (in the UK) padded plunge and body bras in 38B fit although i sometimes have to stretch the band on an expanding skirt hanger for a couple of days first. I still haven’t totally solved the problem of bulging over the band a little tho (i lost 4 stone a few years ago and have been left with some looser/softer skin). I know this would be better if i could get a wider 3 hook band but they don’t seem to exist for small cup size bras!